Is your weight loss goal overshadowing the rest of your life?

Have you ever felt that all you think about is weight loss?  That's a silly question, of course you have!

I've been feeling that way for some time now.  I guess when you've had a 45 year goal it tends to take over your thoughts.  I've began to wonder if my intense focus on this one goal has overshadowed other potential life goals.  It stands to reason that one only has so much brain power and energy at any given time so if one goal is all consuming other goals are set aside, or even worse, not even given consideration.

And here's another thought: by continually focusing all of our thoughts on this goal of weight loss are we actually keeping weight loss success out of our reach?  We are what we think.  If we always think of ourselves as someone who needs to lose weight then we will always be someone who needs to lose weight. And so the vicious cycle continues and other things, other wonderful things, in our lives get left behind.  Life is too short to have all of our possibly amazing experiences overshadowed by one goal.

So what do we do to put our goal of weight loss into perspective so it's doesn't overshadow the rest of our lives?

I believe the key here is to move our thoughts on weight lose from planning the ways to living the ways.  Plans are what we need to get started, but once the plans are made we need to move out of the planning stage and settle into living stage. If you live your plan it will become part of who you are and you won't have to think about it so much therefore freeing up your time to seek new goals. Have you noticed that planning how to lose weight takes up a lot of time? And for some of us who've been doing it for years, and know what we need to do, what a waste of precious time.

Change your daily plan to lose weight to living that plan daily.

One easy way to start living your plan is to address all your food situations with one question:

What would a Weight Watcher do?  And then do that.

"Well, I woke up Sunday mornin' with no way to hold my head that didn't hurt"...Johnny Cash

In reality it was this morning, Monday morning, but that's the song that's running through my head. Yesterday was my birthday and I don't care at all about birthdays, except for the food I give myself permission to have, so I decided instead of going out to dinner I wanted to go to the movies and have a full fledged carb-out: my own bag of popcorn with butter, chip-nuts, and party-mix all washed down with a HUGE, and let's not forget aspartame filled, Diet Coke.  And I thoroughly enjoyed it all. But, of course, when we got home, because I had crashed from my carbo-high so I needed more....so I made, and ate, a box of fat free, sugar free, carb loaded pistachio jello pudding...all 2 cups of it.  It made my heart race, seriously, I was having palpitations. Then I went to bed.

I tossed and turned all night with a churning stomach and hot flashes and am totally useless today. My head aches, my body aches, I can't focus on any one task and all I want to do is go back to bed!

So was it worth it?  I have to say for the most part yes although I think foregoing the pudding would have been a wise move.  

Am I happy with how I planned it?  Again, yes. I thought it out for days, yup, days! I went to the Bulk Barn and bought about a hand full of chip nuts and 2 hand fulls of party-mix...AND for the first time ever, bought a small popcorn.  The last time I did this kind of carb-out was perhaps 5 years ago and compared to my "old days" it was nothin'!

I've become really aware of how putting that crap into my body has made me feel like crap. I usually eat veggies, fruit, eggs, meat and dairy so I know for certain all my aches and pains are a direct result of eating all that crap.  My body usually hums along nicely, today it's shaking, aching and wondering what I have against it!

We are what we eat.  Do you feel tired, aching, and generally crappy a lot of the time?  Maybe you think that's just the way it is.  It's not.  Give your body a chance to feel good by eating healthy food for a while and I guarantee the next time you have a carb-out-pig-out you'll be singing the same tune I was this morning. 

The power of a meeting.

Last week we talked about internal and external hunger and after our Friday meeting I experienced a powerful external trigger.  My friend had just finished her first chemo for her stage 4 colon cancer and I was picking her up at the hospital to take her home to Napanee, so as you can imagine the "trigger" stage was set.  Seeing someone you love start on that kind of journey, which let's face it, has no good outcome affects each of us differently.  For me I get the "Well in the end what does it all matter so I might as well eat" feeling and was immediately thinking of fast food take out.  After all, what does it really matter?

Fortunately, as I always do, I had snacks with me: 2 apples, my favourite coconut 4 SP protein bar and a thermos of coffee. A good thing too as I still had to go on to Kingston to make a return for my friend. Then I got lost, and then the return did not go well and then it was 6 pm and I was frustrated, sad, mad, tired and thoroughly pissed off....at Kingston and wonky Princess Street, at the store for it's stupid return policy, at F@#&ING cancer AND at all the people going through the Wendy's drive thru because I so badly wanted to join them.  But I didn't. I didn't because I had just come from a meeting. I truly believe the meeting made the difference. It helped me to think about my goal and to say "It really does matter."

So I ate my protein bar and two apples, drank my coffee and went home.

What's it going to take before we stop eating junk food?

What is it going to take to get North Americans to eat better?  What shocking piece of new evidence needs to come out to make us finally get the crap we let pass for food off of our plates? What if scientists told us eating foods high in saturated fat and sugar can cause heart disease, high blood pressure that can lead to strokes, type 2 Diabetes and cancer?  Oh wait....they do.  What if experts told us that our daily walk or even daily run is not enough to offset the negative impact of our crappy diets?  Oh wait...they do.. Are we just so used to reading and hearing about it that we have become desensitized to the truth? 

Anyone who is reading this blog knows the above is true but what does it make you think about your own food choices?  It's not that we don't know, we know, we all KNOW and we still don't do anything about it. Why??  What do we need to see and read that will make us change the food on our plates?  

This???

Shocking and scary isn't it?  Or is it?  Maybe we just say to ourselves, "Well, I have a friend who eats healthy foods, walks and plays golf 3 times a week and she was just diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and my grandfather ate and drank whatever he wanted and he lived to be 87!."  In fact that is exactly the diagnosis a dear friend of mine just received and my husband's grandfather did eat whatever he wanted and lived to be 87.  We all know people with similar stories and we can rationalize anything but we all know the real truth: our food can kill or cure.  

So it's back to being a choice, and aren't most things in life always a choice?   We must first choose to be healthy and then do what we need to do to get there.  The odd bit of junk food is not going to kill you, remember it's what you do everyday that counts not what you do once in a while.

Maybe start here:

The connection between being negative and weight loss.

Last week in our meeting I asked if anyone had been kind and loving to themselves the week before and no hands went up for the longest time and then one hand went up....one person out of the whole group had been kind to themselves and even then it was a rare event for that person!   I'd liked to say I was surprised at the lack of self appreciation but I wasn't, after all, we're all the same.

This was not the first time we broached this subject but it's a sensitive topic so I tend to let it go and move on but this time I just couldn't.  The sea of uncomfortable and sad faces was too much so I asked "Why???? Why is it so difficult to show yourself at least the kindness and respect you would show a friend or even a stranger?".  Still nothing and more uncomfortable faces so this time I moved on to our topic of goal setting.  I asked if setting small goals and achieving them made them feel proud of themselves....and nothing.  Then one member said she had never been made to feel that she could reach her goals so now even though she knows what to do and how to do it she can't seem to stick to her plans to reach even her smallest goals.  Not surprising everyone raised their hands in agreement.

A light bulb turned on it my head illuminating what I already know (because I live it):  we will not have full success and reach our goals until we ditch the negative story that we're not capable, not worthy and just not doing it right. Well, that crap has got to stop!  I don't know about you but I am bloody sick and tired of trying to think of changes I can make that will  make me successful at this weight loss game!  I'm done!  From now on I will work the Plan happy in the knowledge that I am doing it perfectly well!

I won't lie, it can be a challenge keeping my new "I'm a success" story in my head but one absolutely undeniable fact keeps me from going back:  My old story just didn't work!!!!  For 54 years I have had this same negative story in my head and I now finally, FINALLY, get it....it didn't, hasn't and never will "work" for me......it doesn't work.  Did you get that??  Negativity does not work.

So this is my new mantra! :)

I urge you, take a look, pay attention, to the thoughts (your story) in your head.  If they are in any way negative you need to change them.  Every time you notice a negative thought banish it, say "Nope, Nada, No More. ". Change your story, change your life.

Here's the beautiful thing about our stories...

Change your story, change your life.