What is your "why"? Why did you walk through the workshop door? Why do you want to lose weight? Why do you want to feel better? We all know this journey begins, and ends, in the mind so identifying "why" you want to change a part of your life helps you stay focused and also helps you to refocus when the journey gets blurry. But knowing your "why" does not guarantee you are living your "why". And here's why: living your "why" requires action, more specifically, action that is in alignment with your "why".
When it comes to actions that line up with our weight loss goals we all know the standard actions: tracking, activity, attending workshops, being kind to yourself, food planning and prep etc. And we know when we put these actions in place we lose weight and feel better. But why is it then that time after time I hear, "I'm doing everything I did before when I was losing but now I'm not!? Why is it that some people can have a setback and the moment they start aligning their actions with their goal the weight comes off again? As a coach it really pains me when I see members hurting and frustrated because I know what a slippery slope it can be. I know it because I live on that slope too.
And then last night on the drive home after our workshop, where we talked about bringing our actions into alignment with our goals, it hit me why it works for some people and not for others: it's not enough that our actions are in alignment with our goals, the FEELINGS we attach to those actions must also be in alignment!
Think about it: when you first walked through the workshop door you already had a feeling the plan would work because it works for a friend, a sister, a co-worker or a neighbour! So you got excited about it, signed up, started tracking, moving, preping food, going to your workshop and on Connect and you lost weight! Happy, happy, joy, joy...the plan works!! Week after week you became more confident, feeling lighter in your heart and your knees and hips were singing with joy!
And then, as in EVERYONE'S journey, life gets busy and/or stressful and perhaps you miss tracking for a few days or you don't have time to prep so a little more fast food creeps in or you're too tired so you skip your daily walk.... for a week. So then, you're either afraid you've gained weight so you skip your workshop or you decide "to face the music" and weigh in and yup, your weight is up. As feelings of failure leap at the chance to reign again you resolve to get back to all the actions that helped you lose the weigh in the first place and, yay you, you start tracking, preping, walking everything....and the weight doesn't come off, and maybe you go up a bit. You sit in workshop after workshop wondering what it is you're doing wrong? You think, "Others have had setbacks and they lose the weight once back on Plan, why not me?".
I've thought the same about my own journey for several years and now I know why: it's not enough that our actions are in alignment with our goals, the FEELINGS we attach to those actions must also be in alignment! The people who get back on track and get the results still believe that the Plan works....EVERY time! The feelings they attach to the actions of tracking, food prep, activity are joy, belief, confidence, peacefulness, happiness, satisfaction and well-being....just like they did the first time the Plan worked for them!
So I ask you, what are the feelings you are attaching to your actions?
-Are your tracking but fearful it won't work or do you love the feeling of security tracking gives you?
-Are you getting activity in only to lose weight or because it feels good to move your body and calm your mind while making your knees and hips happy?
-Do you begrudgingly take the time to plan, shop, cook, chop and bag food because it's important or do you happily plan, shop, cook, chop and bag so you can come home at the end of a stressful day to a delicious and easy meal?
-Do you look forward to your workshops because you enjoy being with your loving tribe or are you scared if you don't go you'll gain more weight?
-Do you feel nervous in the check-in line no matter what kind of week you've had or do you review the past week without judgment and believe you're not a number?
-Do you attach shame and fear of judgement to a gain or do you smile and say, unapologetically, life just got in the way last week?
Where your head goes your body will follow.
2 comments:
You were speaking directly to me as you do in most of your blogs.
I will need to read today blog a couple of times as I know I need to hammer into my head the idea that I’m not like everyone else . I would love to feel like I did the first time I joined a workshop and have that confidence and persistance I once had on making better choices . One thing I remembered was when I first joined was that I was so afraid to go out for a meal , I stayed home with my husband for every meal so I wouldn’t have the worry of over eating and not getting my blue dot . I think of that time when I get frustrated as I have been as you know for months now .
Being accountable is key and you’re my person .
So you have just identified yourself as the friend I vowed to track with/for, you're kinda famous in my workshops! The way you're feeling is more the norm than not, so many of us feel the same way. Since we became accountable to each other I have tracked every day...the good, the bad and the ugly. And I'm finding I look forward to it, even though I had a 43 pt day Sunday and 40 pt on Monday. It just feels different, no guilt, no shame, just peace. You are my person.
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