When it comes to cultivating happiness, my instrument of choice is now gratitude. I know that may sound very Oprah/Deepak but it's true. A few years back I started trying to be happy with where I was and what I had but no matter what I did I wasn't happy. Why? Because I was trying to access happiness with "things", constantly trying to find and get the "next thing" that would make me happy.
Then somewhere during my relentless search for happiness (you remember me once saying I never give up and am constantly searching for answers? ) I heard/saw the statement below:
Show gratitude for what I have right now? "But I don't want what I have right now?" But Oprah said it (and I do love Oprah!), so I started to think about it ...."Even though I'm not happy right now, I know I have much to be grateful for." So, I started. First of all I listed all the general items: family, friends, health, roof over my head, enough food to eat, bills are paid etc. Right off the bat I felt ashamed because I knew I had nothing to bitch about! I knew it but that didn't change how I felt because cognitively "knowing" something doesn't mean we're able to put it into practice. I was worried my thoughts of "lacking" were so abundant and strong that introducing new thoughts would be difficult, if not impossible. But then something simple, and rather startling, happened....I felt better. I felt better and it was easy....ummm, that was unusual!
Feeling grateful changed my mood instantly and I felt happiness! Me liked that one!
That moment of awareness was a game changer for me. After a while I started to dig deeper into my well of things to be grateful for, smaller, unpredictable, things: an unexpected kind word, a warm day in January, a cold snowy day in January (and not having to get into my car!!), my son calling me out of the blue and my husband finally agreeing it was time to get a dog! And, are you ready for this??? The seemingly smaller the thing was that I felt grateful for, the greater the happiness I felt. Isn't that fantastic? Do you realize what that means? It means, if not a single solitary thing in your life changes, but you feel grateful what you already have, your happiness can grow in leaps and bounds!
Your well of the things to be grateful for is bottomless! And when Oprah talks about "having more" she's not talking about having more stuff, she's saying that by acknowledging what we already have we automatically have more!
I am grateful for all of you.
And I'm grateful that I don't care if that sounds corny!! :)
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