Remember: You are not alone!

This journey that many of us have been on for sooooo long often seems very lonely because most of this journey goes on in our head, which let's face it, can be a really scary place!  Often when we're hurting we withdraw into the darkness of ourselves instead of searching for the light of others.  And, unless you're a mushroom or mold, you can not thrive in the dark!

Joining in the Weight Watcher meetings will bring the light back into your journey!  The positive, and non-judgmental, energy of the group is contagious and reminds you that you're not alone.  You'll feel motivated, inspired and buoyed up....all the feelings you need to help carry you through the week! 

So don't go it alone, the load is lighter when it is shared!

We can't always wait until the timing is right!

I started a Facebook page (J. Hartman's "If not now, when?") last week. It was something I've wanted to do for a long while now because I'm hoping you all will join in, share and feel connected.  It took me a long time to do the Facebook page, and this blog too, because I kept telling myself I wasn't ready and I wanted to wait until I could do it perfectly.  

Ha!  Well, I can tell you my blog and FB page are not, and will never be, perfect! Whew, what a relief...striving for perfection can be so tiring! And I'm OK with that...for the first time in my life, I'm really OK with that.  I finally started because I KNEW if I waited until I was ready, and could do it perfectly, I would never do it.  Sound familiar?  It was just an excuse because I was afraid.  I was afraid of failing, afraid no one would read it and/or Like it.  I was also afraid that people would read it and/or Like it!  So I did nothing.  Again, sound familiar??

We hear many times "it's just not the right time" and "I'm not there yet", I'm not in the right head space"....these are excuses to not start, not reasons. If we wait until we're ready there will always be a road block and most of them will be self-imposed. I know because I've used these excuses many times but I now know they come from fear.  Fear will hold us back like no other emotion!  And the only way to get past the fear is to believe that we only truly fail when we do nothing.  If we try and never give up we have succeeded! 

Just start, you'll learn as you go along just like the rest of us!  And once you've started you will find that the fear will leave you because it can only hold on to you if you refuse to let it go.

Believe that we only truly fail when we do nothing, so just start!

Check out my facebook page!

I think it may be easier to interact with everyone with a Facebook page!  Hope you'll Like it!

www.facebook.com/jmhartmanifnotnowwhen

It's not enough to know what you want.

We all know what we want.  I can wager that the next sentence pretty much wraps up "what" we want in a nutshell:  We want to lose weight and feel good about ourselves.  Am I right?

It's pretty simple so why is it so very hard for us to achieve?  It's hard to achieve for some of us because we are only doing half of the process...it's not enough to know what you want, you must "do and be" what you want".  Does that make sense?

Here's a very simple example: If you want to be a doctor, you don't become a doctor by just saying it or thinking it do you?  You have to go do what it takes to be a doctor and losing weight is no different.
To be a doctor you must:
-get into med school (sign up for Weight Watchers)
-attend the classes (attend the meetings)
-study anatomy and do your homework (learn the plan and work it at home)
-become a intern and practice what you've learned (live as a Weight Watcher and practice what you have learned)
-you get a piece of paper that says you're a doctor so everyday you do what a doctor would do (you get a piece of paper that says you are a Weight Watcher so everyday you do what a Weight Watcher would do)
-you are a doctor (you are a Weight Watcher)

 It's not enough to know what you want....You have to do what you want!

You are a Weight Watcher, do what a Weight Watcher does!!

It's pretty hard to stay motivated when you're always doing The Hokey Pokey with your goal!

A major topic these days at meetings is motivation, or lack there of.  As anyone who comes to a meeting that I lead knows, I like to use the great pearls of wisdom I borrow from successful people to motivate and inspire us into meaningful conversation.  Last week someone asked me, "How do you stay motivated to stay on plan?"....and I have to tell you, I was stumped for a second!  I was stumped for an automatic answer because I have been motivated to lose weight for sooooo long, 43 years to be exact, that it is ingrained in me to never give up and always jump back on the next wagon. 

Thankfully ,(whew!) I did have an answer, and it was:

"I keep my weight loss goal front and center at ALL TIMES...

I fit my life into Weight Watchers, not Weight Watchers into my life." 

When Weight Watchers is just one of the many things that you do, how easy does it  fall to the bottom of your daily list?  Very freakin' easy, right? We all have many parts of our lives that demand our attention and demand to be at the top of our list.  So here's the question: If Weight Watchers is simply on your list, what chance does it have of ever being at the top of your list when it has to compete with jobs, family, household chores, social commitments etc?  That's right...slim to none  most days. :(

But if you make Weight Watchers the center from which the rest of your day flows, your choices will automatically be different.  They will be different because you are making the choices as a Weight Watcher, not just as someone who goes to Weight Watchers.  See the difference?  "I go" to Weight Watchers or "I am" a Weight Watcher....which one are you?

Believe it or not, it's actually easier when you live it because it takes a lot of the dabbling out of it. It's kinda like The Hokey-Pokey..."you put your left foot in, you put your left foot out"....which means sometimes you're in and sometimes you're out.... and that's called dabbling.  And dabbling never allows you to swing into your own personal high gear and, here's the thing Peeps.... it's those moments of personal high gear that keep you motivated!  They motivate you because you created them and you own them!

We can certainly can an "aha" and be momentarily super motivated by the words and actions of those around us BUT lasting Dear-Lord-get-me-through-the-weekend motivation must come from within!  And I believe the best way to get, and more importantly to stay, motivated is to live it, live it, live it, until you know no other way to live!

Stop dabbling...Live your goal everyday

and you'll see how successful you can be!

And remember, it's called a lifestyle 

because it is the style in which you live!

So, just how committed are you to changing?

"If you do what you've always done, 

you'll get what you've always got."

Many of us are in the same boat and that boat is floatin' down denial!  We want to lose weight but we really, REALLY, don't want to make the changes necessary to do so.  We join WW, we get our allotted daily Points Plus Values and what are the very first foods we look up in our Pocket Guides?  We all rush to find how much pizza, ice cream, chips and pie, oh my, we can eat and still lose weight! Right?  We don't want to change.

Even though we are advised that the way to lose weight is to put most of our Points Plus Values towards Power Foods, we don't....we don't want to accept that in order to lose we must change.  And for most of us that means changing what, and the way, we've been eating for much of our lives....."If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got." 

It's not easy but I truly believe WW can guide you through those changes IF you commit to making small, consistent, daily efforts.  So try the monthly routines and member tips, put more Power Foods in your daily diet, add that walk into your day.  Do those things and, presto-change-o, you're no longer doing what you've always done!

No, it's not easy but guess what?  It's not that hard either.  

And if you want to change and just won't, or can't, do it,

perhaps you need to ask yourself "why?".  

Maybe the answer to your "why" is holding you back.  

Think about it.

"Sometimes it's okay if the only thing you did today was breathe!"

Some days suck.  Period!  Those are the days when being kind to yourself and just taking a breath is the best medicine.  It doesn't mean (sorry!) that we drown our selves in food and liquor, ha, ha....(however, it may be a good day to use your extra food and activity points and not feel guilty about it:)

On days when you feel the life being sucked right out of you, pause, take a breath and then zap those sucky horrible feelings by reflecting and be thankful and grateful....yes, thankful AND grateful.  Being thankful and grateful for who you are and what you already have will heal your soul faster than any amount of food!  And zero Points Plus Value's!  

Then....be kind to someone else.  When we acknowledge someone else's pain and upset, it's like the window we opened to help nurse their pain lets in a fresh restorative air that flows over us.  It's not that their sadness cheers us up, it's that the sharing, and caring, of another's strife lightens the load for all involved.

Maya Angelou said it best....

If you're not getting the weekly email from WW, subscribe to it.  It always has wonderful tips!
http://www.weightwatchers.ca/util/art/index_art.aspx?tabnum=1&art_id=139180

If you hate starting over, stop quitting....:)

How many times have you stopped working the program because... it's just not working?  It's too hard?  It's never ending?  It costs too much?  You're tired of the routine? You're tired of lettuce?

And how many times after stopping the program have you thought, "I need to get back to WW!!"?  How long did it take you to walk back in through those doors?  Were you embarrassed?  Was your weight up? Did you ever start back and your hadn't gained most or all of the weight back? Were you back to ALL of your old unhealthy habits?  Were you unhappy and angry with yourself for quitting the program, again?  How many times have you thought,  "I just don't want to have to start ALL over again."?  How many times? Seriously, how many times??

If you're like me you've had a life time of starting and stopping, years of weight up and weight down, countless negative thoughts about how you've failed...yet again.  Do you want to be done with all that?  Here's how... stop quitting.  If you hate starting over, then stop quitting!  Never give up. 

It finally dawned on me that it never ends...it never, never, never, EVER ends!  We don't call it Lifetime for nothin"!  And, yes, it's still an effort but it's truly GLORIOUS because it means you have changed!  You've changed your destructive behavior, changed your negative thoughts, changed your unhealthy routines....you've changed your life!

Now, I know you're thinking, "What if I never give up, keep on working the plan but don't reach Lifetime?" What if that happens, what does that mean?  What it means is that you have not reached the goal weight you've set and maintained it for 6 weeks, that's all.  It does not mean that you're not healthier, thinner, and happier!  You're more fit, more accepting, more positive and you're "inside numbers" are singing! 

I can almost guarantee all those wonderful health benefits
would not be yours if you quit.

AND finally...

 Never, EVER, be embarrassed to walk into a meeting,

for the first time or for the hundredth time,

it is a place where you are loved, accepted and understood.

Always.

Maybe you need a new reason?

If you're like me the reason you exercise is to lose weight....everything I do seems to be to lose weight! When I was a kid my Mother taught us to end our nightly prayer with "God Bless Mommy and Daddy, Nan and Jim, Grandma and June".  When I was at the age to go to bed and say prayers on my own my prayer was "God Bless Mommy and Daddy, Nan and Jim, Grandma and June, and please help me to lose weight". I kid you not.  

Very soon in my young life I became obsessed with losing weight and what happens when we become obsessed with anything?  Well, in my experience, obsessions are really time consuming and leave little room for anything else.  I missed out on so much because I was so insecure about my looks that I wanted to be thin before joining in...what a waste of youth!  Does this sound familiar?  If it doesn't sound familiar, it may seem dumb and ridiculous but it was my reality.  Loosing weight was the driving force in my life and became my "reason".    

What I want to focus this week is the "reason".  Really, and truly, the ONLY reason I used to work-out or join a gym was to lose weight!  I never, ever, thought about taking a walk to enjoy nature or clear my head, ride my bike for fun, or go swimming to cool off on a hot summer day.  And until recently, very recently....maybe a few months ago, I still used my walks to help me lose weight.  Sure, I felt good afterward, but that was not the REASON I walked out the door.  I laced up my shoes, walked out my door to lose weight, period.

But recently I've noticed I have some new "reasons" to walk...

• I walk to clear my head of busyness or negativity and relax into my good thoughts.  
• I walk to get away from my desk work and miraculously come back with solutions.
• I walk to move my body and give my back some much needed love.
• I walk to spend time with my husband (and dog Super James, of course!).
• I walk to daydream. 
• I walk to plan our next vacation. 
• I walk to help me lose weight...still a great reason, just not my only reason anymore!
• I walk to think about what to write in my blog this week....and this is what came to me this morning!  

Why do I have a new reason(s)?  My reasons have changed because I've changed.  

I no longer want just to lose weight. I want to live a happy and peaceful existence, period.  \

Oh look, another great reason to walk....:)

So, if you're like me,
maybe you need to use a new reason to go for that walk, bike ride or swim!!

Just go do it everyday...

 and the weight will take care of itself ...

Just take the first step!

Today is one of those days when everything is colliding and I don't know which on my to-do list to do first!  Then I think..."just do something...just take a step!!!".  Usually the best step is to write down what needs to be done first and when I do that, everything gets done and with me left with most of my hair!

It's the same way with activity...you just have to take a step.  You don't have to see yourself finishing a marathon, just see yourself putting on your shoes and walking down the driveway.  If you walk down the driveway, chances are you'll walk down the road.  And just like that you've added activity into your day!  If that seems simple, it's because it is.

  

You just have to take that first step and the next step will automatically follow...

if it doesn't, you'll fall over...but at least you'll be moving! :)