Once a Weight Watcher, always a Weight Watcher.

Because I'm a leader I don't often see the LT's that come in once a month for their weigh in but yesterday I was filling in as receptionist and got to catch up with E. who said I could share her story. I'm not often floored but she got me.

E. has been at goal for many years and has always seemed to me to be one of the lucky ones who "gets it" meaning gets what it takes to stay at goal.  She looked fabulous, as always, happy and friendly, as always.  And then I asked her how she's been and she said, "Well, 3 months ago I found out I had cancer and had a mastectomy, but it all went well and I feel great."  That news was upsetting, as it always is when you hear that someone has had cancer and we chatted about her experience.  E. mentioned that her weight had started to drop for seemingly no reason.  At first it was great, (once a Weight Watcher, always a Weight Watcher, right?) but she also knew something was wrong.

This is the part that floored me. After catching up it was time for weigh in and E. was suddenly anxious about getting on the scale and very seriously said, "Oh, I hope I haven't gained.".  And I, very unprofessionally, blurted out, "Gained?  Are you serious?  You just had mastectomy 2 months ago! Are you telling me that after having cancer you are still worried about whether or not your weight went up???"  Yup, floored.

And then we started laughing and agreed...once a Weight Watcher, always a Weight Watcher, even in the wake of cancer! We usually think that life threatening experiences forever change how we view everything else in our lives but E.'s story reminds us how deeply rooted our fear of the scale can be.

I want to thank E. for not only allowing me to share her story, but encouraging me to do so. As she continues her journey to live Beyond the Scale, I hope you find the strength to do so as well.  It's time, don't you think?

"Hello, my name is Joanne and I'm an addict." are words I have spoken.

Yes, it's true, I have not lost any more weight since I quit eating sugar.  And I can just hear some, if not all, of your thoughts right now:  So why stop?  In fact my husband and I had that same conversation while we were on holidays in January.  At the time I wasn't sure why I didn't want to just "treat" myself but I didn't.  Then I remembered why.

I am a sugar addict.  And I don't need a scientific study to tell me sugar is addictive or not addictive. I know the definition of addiction: "a strong and harmful need to regularly have something" and  I lived it for about 30 years.

So. let's see.

1 Tolerance - I don't remember, who remembers their first taste of sugar?  First birthday? All I do know is my Mom is a sugar addict and she still to this day puts sugar on her cucumbers and tomatoes.

2. Obsession  - Confession time. I grew up in a general store, the old fashioned ones with the house and store as one.  I recall at 12-13 years old sneaking down stairs in the middle of the night and going into the store to get a 12 pack of butter tarts.  Since that was too hard on my conscience I took up baking.  My Mom was thrilled.  To this day I cannot bake without getting very anxious.

3. Increase intake -  Once I started baking there was no limit. My parents only allowed my brother and I to have one .25 treat a week from the store but we were allowed to eat as much "food" as we wanted.  This is also when my eating disorder of binging and starving started.  It would last for about 12 years until I got pregnant and I went into Mother-mode.

4. Loss of control - Even though I was out of control while living at home it was when I went away to school at 18 that I really sunk into the addiction.  I had my own apartment and would often hole up for an entire weekend eating only candy and cans of Betty Crocker icing.  I would eat until I was literally throwing up.  And let's not forget all the times I would  throw something out and then dig it back out of the garbage.  Fortunately it was only our of my own garbage.

5. Abuse despite harm -  I knew I had a problem, At 16 I told my Mom and doctor and showed them an article about eating disorders.  The doctor told me it was nothing and my Mom was relieved. Still at 20 years old I had read enough to know I was harming my body but was powerless to stop.

7. Withdrawal symptoms - If any of you has ever tried to stop sugar you know how hard it is.  One time I could not get off of the couch for 3 days as the headaches, shakes, nausea, aches and pains were so bad.  But to be fair, that was after coming off of a 3 or 4 month stint of a steady diet of mostly candy.  

I don't know if you can relate to any part of my experience but here is what I know for sure. This past year I have conducted my own experiment:  I feel great and in control when I don't eat sugar and like crap and out of control when I do.  Pretty simple.

So, where am with my addiction today?  I continue to say I'm an addict because I still have mini relapses that remind me.  I try to cut out all sugar but admit to occasionally having a bite or two of my husbands ice cream cone.  Since 76% of packaged food has added sugar it's really hard to avoid it altogether but I try.

I would be remiss if I didn't post the known harmful effects of sugar on our bodies. These are in addition to, of course, the mental roller coaster ride caused by daily sugar consumption while trying to lose weight.  You know exactly what I'm talking about, don't you?

Now if all of the above don't make you take a pause and re-think sugar, let's go back to the role sugar plays in your life.  Do experience any or all of the signs of addiction?  Are you saying yes but still believe you can "handle it"?  Are you able to abstain from sugar for a day or two, maybe a week but then hit it hard like it's the last time you'll ever have it because it's leaving the planet?  Are you sick and tired of your weight loss being hijacked by little white crystals? Maybe it's time to make a change.  I promise you life without sugar is still worth living!  

Oh, and the reason I did not lose more weight 

when I cut out the sugar....they're called chips.

Let your vanity help you lose weight!

We all know that sugar, salt and trans fats are bad for our health yet we ignore the staggering scientific facts and continue to eat them regularly.  We also know they're a huge hindrance to losing and maintaining weight yet we insist on working them into our daily and weekly plans because we have "the points" for them!

This week I'm going to appeal to your sense of vanity, a quality I possess, and in this instance, has served me well over the years.

Sugar and trans fats cause inflammation which produce enzymes that break down collagen and elastin, resulting in sagging skin and wrinkles. Plus eating sugar can cause insulin resistance which can manifest as excessive hair growth and dark patches on the skin.  That's nice.


That could be you.  Sodium decrease the amount of water intake of your internal organs and when they are thirsty and dehydrated they steal the water out of your skin. Check the amount of processed food sneaking into your diet as it tends to be very high in salt AND sugar.



This one is the main reason I skip sugar, it causes hot flashes which make sleeping almost impossible and lack of sleep also ages your skin. Sadly artificial sugar mimics sugar in more ways than one. Bam, triple whammy!

And for all you young people just remember,

what you do in your 20's, 30's and 40's comes back 

to bite you in the ass during your 50's, 60's, 70's and 80's!  

Old habits die hard.

A mass shooting in Orlando, an alligator drags toddler into the water at Disney resort, a 16 year old Stirling boy still suffers from traumatic brain injury from horrific car accident, my friend Donna is still dead, my friend Sylvia is thrilled her chemo may buy her another year of life and I continue to be obsessed with losing 6 pounds.  WTF?

Why does it take something sad happening in the world before I give myself a slap upside the head and vow to stop hating my wobbly bits and concentrate on loving what's important?  Why can't I live my life knowing that my wobbly bits are just bits and not me?  Why can I not be grateful for my wobbly bits all of the time instead of just for fleeting moments when the true reality of life jars me into doing so?

Why?  Because such is the strength of habit.  It has been my habit to be negative about myself for as long as I can remember.  I will only say this about how this habit developed: praise the children in your life, acknowledge their accomplishments, let them know how capable they really are and don't make them spend their lives trying to earn your approval.

We develop habits out of need, some serve us well, others hold us back but either way they help make us who we are and we need to peel away those that no longer serves us.  When it comes to peeling away the habit of negative thought it's tricky, after all, that's where we live.  Trying to banish negative thoughts doesn't seem to work because that action comes from a place of resistance and what we resists persists.  In other words getting pissed off about our negative thoughts just gives them more power!

I love this approach. By concentrating on releasing the negative thought by acknowledging that we know longer need it sets up a new healthy self-loving habit.  So the next time you have a negative thought about your body repeat the following, "I release the need for this in my life".   

And then say thank you to your wobbly bits for 

unlike bad habits, they have served you well.

"I can't believe I have to watch everything I eat for the next 25 years"! A real statement by a very successful LT member.

This weeks blog could also be called "Even LT members get the blues!"  Last week while weighing in this slightly over goal LT member she startled me with a very emotional "I can't believe I have to watch everything I eat for the next 25 years"!  What startled me was not the statement but the emotion behind it.  This member has always seemed to take the process in stride and with optimism, but in truth even LT's get the blues.  My heart ached for her, I knew exactly how she felt.

We often talk/laugh about the true meaning of Lifetime...it means it's for LIFE and it NEVER ends! Can you remember when that realization hit you?  Or has it not hit you yet?  It never ends.

But just because we know and accept that it never ends doesn't mean we are free from feeling the occasional weight of it all on our shoulders. It happens and because it happens we have no choice but to accept it and then figure out what to do about it.  

I've been all of those!  How about you? I think the hardest thing for me was accepting that what once got me to goal and helped me maintain that goal didn't work for me anymore.  I continued to do the same things that got me to goal, being ever so optimistic that they would work again.....they did not! So I finally became a realist and adjusted my sails.  And for me adjusting my sails meant not only adjusting my daily target but also adjusting my daily thoughts.  I will say adjusting ones thoughts may just be the most important step.

There comes a time when we all need to adjust our sails, no matter where we are on our weight loss journey.  Did you once have wonderful success on the Plan and now it doesn't seem to be working? Are you stalled but keep optimistically doing what you've been doing all along waiting for it to start working again?  Are you the pessimist who complains that the Plan does not work?  Are you working only part of the Plan but expecting to get full Plan results?  Are you an LT member who is beyond frustrated that you have to watch everything you eat for the next 25 years?  

Don't give up, 

just adjust your sails so you can continue to

move toward your goal, or back to goal.

Every summer has it's own story. What will yours be this year?

By now we've had a nice little taste of summer, BBQ's, ice cream, drinks on the porch and a scale that refuses to let any any of it slide!  Now is the time we need to ask ourselves, "Am I willing to throw my summer weight loss/maintenance goals away for another year?"  I can hear a resounding "No!!!!!".  But if we don't make, and commit to, a plan of action that is exactly what we're doing.

Correct me if I'm wrong but this is how the past few weeks have been:  Monday to Friday (or whenever your work week falls) you manage to get the fruits and veggies in and cook up lean protein so you can make great on-Plan choices.  But then the end of the work week rolls around and since the weather is finally nice we feel entitled to relax and for us that usually means enjoying anything from fast food to our favourite mayonnaise-laden summer salads. It's only Friday and our weekly allowance is gone but that's okay we'll stay within our daily budgets for the rest of the weekend, right?  Nope!  The next morning you wake up and the weather is beautiful and you remember the patio is open at your favourite restaurant, or you think what a great day for a wine tour, or ...insert " just about anything else that tickles your summer fancy" here!  And just like that the summer weekend has voided most, if not all, of your weeks work.  So, is this how it's going to be from now until Labour Day?  Actually, it's more like two weeks after Labour Day before we get back on track.  Remember how we were going to get back on track January 2?  Ya right, more like January 22!

So, now is the time to plan the outline for your summer story.  Does it involve lots of fun and excess? Or does it involve lots of fun and planned indulgences?  Will your summer story end with you frustrated that yet another summer has gone by and you're no closer to your goal?  Or will it end with you the hero of your story, proud of yourself, in control and on Plan?

Are you just going through the motions of being a Weight Watcher?

Sometimes when we've been doing something for a long time we think we're still doing it with the same intent and gusto as when we first started but are we?  If we're no longer getting the same results, are we still really putting in the same efforts?  Or are we just going through the motions?

If you find you are stagnating perhaps it's time to take a good honest look at your efforts.  And really, if you have been doing this for a long time there is a good chance your efforts have dwindled or at least changed.  I've had to re-evaluate my efforts more than a few times over the years!

Never mistake motion or for action: 

 how can we examine this when it comes to being a Weight Watcher?

-Do you faithfully go to your meetings but have hit a plateau in your weight loss?

-Do you consider yourself a good food planner but in reality find that several days a week you have to order in or take a frozen something out of the freezer?

-Your consider yourself a walker/swimmer/gym person but in the past few months your usual 4 to 5 times a week has dropped to 1 or 2 times a week?

-You were a tracking star when you first started but now track less than half the time because you eat the same food all the time so "know" how much you're taking in?

-You used to work all sides of the plan: food, fitness and fulfillment but when you think of it very little new effort is aimed in their direction?

If some or all of the above apply to you, perhaps you are just going through the motions but without true action.  If this is you, welcome to the club, because all of the examples from above are from my own personal experience!  

And if you're not moving forward,

 perhaps it's time to re-evaluate and see what are 

truly actions and what are just motions.

The trouble is, you think you have time. Buddha

Last week my dear friend Donna had a bad headache which turned out to be an aneurysm and she died.  That is the short version of the story.  Her death has left us all reeling and I can't help but search for the meaning of it all and I keep coming back to this: stop wasting time.

Here's my personal "Stop Wasting Time" to-do list:

Stop wasting time worrying, if you can do something about it, do it, if not let it go.

Stop wasting time on people who don't value you, and by this I mean stop trying to change them into the person who gets what a fantastic person you are.

Stop wasting time on what you think other people think of you, they don't really think about you all that much, they're too busy thinking about their own shit.

Stop wasting time being fearful of trying something new, the worst thing that can happen is that you don't like it or you're not good at it and neither of those things will kill you.

Stop wasting time measuring yourself with someone else's stick.  I guarantee when you die no one with talk about your thighs or your stomach.

Stop wasting bucket list time:  if there is something you'd like to do or somewhere you'd like to go that requires you to be be under the age of 80 because of the possible physical limitations, do it now. 

Stop wasting time hanging on to past pain which when you think of it encompasses most of the above so we must consider this one a super time waster.

Stop wasting time setting a goal, making plans of how to achieve it and then never actually put those plans into action.  If you're not going to act then planning is a waste of time.

Stop wasting time thinking you have more time, you don't.  You just have now.

And for those of us who say we don't have time....

One thing I know for sure is if I live to be the grand old broad I aspire to be, I really don't want to fill my time thinking of all the time I wasted. 


 

What a difference a day makes.

As much as I like to write about how emotions and thoughts can influence our chance of success, every once in a while I have go back to some hard truths about daily behaviour.  Does your daily behaviour represent a true desire to change? Are you doing what is necessary daily for lasting change or are you doing the hokey-pokey?  You know, "Right foot in, right foot out, right foot in, then you shake it all about"....the hokey-pokey, you're shaking your leg but you're not moving forward. 

I've seen it time and time again (and I've lived it time and time again so I'm not pointing figures here!) where members get all fired up for change and have 1 or 2 successful weeks and then right back to their old habits: not tracking, not exercising, not planning, missing meetings, etc.  Why?  Why does that happen?  I think if you are truly honest with yourself you will admit that you are not willing to do what it takes to change daily.  You want to change, would like to change but when it comes to actually doing what it takes to change on a  daily basis, you're not there yet.  

This may seem daunting but really, from my experience, living in limbo is much, much, worse.  Living with the highs of a few days or weeks of success and then living with the crippling lows when is all falls apart yet again is exhausting and breaks down our already fragile psyche. 

One final thought about the hokey-pokey, 

                                see you at the next meeting!

How I indulge but not overindulge.

Indulge: to allow oneself to enjoy a particular pleasure

Overindulge: to indulge in a particular pleasure to excess

Eating a normal amount of sweets or bread has always been almost impossible for me, hence, my no sugar habit since last July.  I'm fortunate that bread and other dough foods do not agree with me so I gave them up long ago.  One could make the point (that one being my husband) that I've not lost a pound since giving up sugar and I will agree the point.  But here's the rub (the rub: a difficulty, especially one of central importance in a situation): even though I have not lost weight because of no sweets, I know without a shadow of a doubt if I had continued to eat sweets my weight would have gone up!!  And I would've had to suffer through my weekly sugar-binge hangovers...not pleasant. 

But I'm off topic. How to indulge but not overindulge. I still have plenty of indulgences and the only way I can keep from crossing into overindulging territory is to control the amount purchased.  So for me the means indulging at a restaurant or buying a very specific amount at the grocery store to enjoy at home.

Every one is different and you may be one of those lucky people who can portion out a dessert and keep/freeze the rest for later, buy a big bag of chips and divide it up into portioned baggies, get those cookies on sale and have just 1 each day with your tea, or buy the gallon of ice cream because 1/4 of a cup is plenty for you.

OR...you are exactly like me BUT hope, wish and dream you're not!  So you keep bringing your "excess pleasure" food into your house telling yourself this time will be different.  This time you're going to get those baggies out and count out 21 chips. This time, although you've never done it before, that big honkin' cheesecake is going into the freezer for next time.  Wrong, they all go into your mouth, 'cause you're just like me.  And if for some reason you do not eat all of the cake/chips/ice cream/cookies, having it call your name until you do is agony and soul destroying (soul destroying may be just me, I tend to be high drama).

There's nothing wrong with you, or me, we're just not equipped with the portion control gene.  So for us portion control must be taken out of our hands.  And that's okay, in fact, it's wonderful!  Imagine how you'd feel if you enjoyed a lovely piece of confectionery heaven knowing when it was finished there wasn't anymore to torture you?  I'll tell you how you'd feel: in control and on Plan.  I guess that's why for now I will continue to not eat desserts.  Ribs on the other hand, bring 'em on!